EP 15 – Overcoming Trauma with Leah Carey

EP 15 – Overcoming Trauma with Leah Carey

Ep. 15: Overcoming Trauma with Leah Carey

Overcoming Trauma with Leah Carey

Overcoming Trauma with Leah Carey #15

Host of the Good Girls Talk About Sex podcast and sexual communication coach, Leah Carey is sharing her thoughts on the importance of sexual freedom and how she spent most of her life being a “very good girl.” Finding sex was boring or painful, Leah didn’t know she could ask for anything different. Listen to Leah’s journey to breaking that pattern and how she’s now passionate about breaking fear and shame for women. 

 

Ladies, it’s time to explore what you want and deserve!

 

What we’re talking about

 

  • Trauma Isn’t Always Physical
  • Leah’s Journey To Sexual Freedom
  • Body Positivity & Body Neutrality

 

Trauma Isn’t Always Physical

Growing up, Leah was told by her dad that she was fat, ugly and no one would ever love her. As she became an adult, she discovered that these were not inherent truths about herself but she couldn’t see that because she had been believing in what was said to her. As an adult, Leah believed in her brokenness in part because of the sex she had in her life which was either painful or simply not sesnsational. Leah shares that not all trauma is physical. She hadn’t been physically abused, but her memories were enough to cause trauma and create coping mechanisms that she created as a child and carried on as an adult. 

 

Leah doesn’t do trigger warnings when it comes to her podcast or content because she feels they’re overused and don’t give the message that people are stronger than they think. Every one of us is stronger than the trauma we’ve experienced. 

 

Leah’s Journey To Sexaul Freedom

 

Having little to no sexual sensation, Leah got to a place in life where she felt there should be pleasure when having sex and discovered tantric massage in which people with vaginas were able to refind sensation. She booked herself a 3 hour session and discovered that her pleasure signals were not getting to her brain, but her body, nervous system and sexual responses were all normal. She was not broken! And with that discovery, a door which had been slammed shut years before was suddenly opened back up. 

 

Leah went on a mission to find pleasure and on a solo trip around the country, she started posting and replying to Craigslist personal ads which led to threesomes and other adventures she’d been curious about. Part of Leah’s journey involved going to Hedonism and to her surprise, she found that she fit right in and that no one had a perfect body. The people who are most attractive and sexy are those who happily inhabit their bodies. The level of sexiness of a woman has absolutely nothing to do with the size of her body and everything to do with how she inhabits her body.

 

Body Positivity & Body Neutrality

 

Briana describes what it means to be fat positive, which is being comfortable with the word “fat.” Leah comes from a sex positive Portland community in which their goal isn’t body positivity, but body neutrality. Leah shares that it’s not about fawning over our bodies, but getting to the point that we are ok with our bodies, just as we are ok with having fingernails. It’s working towards not obsessing with any part of your body or your body overall and finding accepting in what it is and does for you. 

 

Are you 5% braver than you were last week?

 

LINKS MENTIONED

Leah Carey’s Website 

Good Girls Talk About Sex Podcast

Good Girls Talk About Sex Facebook

Good Girls Talk About Sex Instagram

Good Girls Talk About Sex YouTube

If you enjoyed this episode and want more, join our FB group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/fatgirlfindslove/

You can also find Fat Girl Finds Love:

FP Page: https://www.facebook.com/FatGirlFindsLovePod/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fatgirlfindslove/

Twitter: @exxxxtrafat

 TIMESTAMPS

11:21 – 12:08 (47 sec) LC – No, I think it’s really important…that is not how it works.

 

16:43 – 17:42 (59 sec LC) there has to be more…you are not broken

 

QUOTES

 

  1. I fully believed in my brokenness because of the sex I had in my life. LC
  2. I don’t do trigger warnings. I think you’re stronger than the trauma you’ve experienced. LC
  3. You’ll go as far, as fast as you’re ready for. LC
  4. Not all trauma is physical. LC
  5. The level of sexiness of a woman has absolutely nothing to do with the size of her body and everything to do with how she inhabits her body. LC
  6. My goal isn’t about body positivity, it’s about body neutrality. LC
  7. You just need to be 5% braver than you were last week. LC
  8. Trigger warnings are overused because they’re not giving people the message that they’re stronger than they think. LC

Transcript coming soon!

Most people learn about new podcasts throughfriends. So please share the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast with your fellow podcasters on twitter. If this episode got you all fired up SUBSCRIBE wherever you get your podcasts! ONE CLICK!

Community!

You can ask your questions continue the conversation and meet your fellow Fat Girl Finds Love Community members, by simply joining the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast Facebook Group!

EP 13 – Fat and Fertility with Nicola Salmon

EP 13 – Fat and Fertility with Nicola Salmon

Ep. 12: Fat & Fertility with Nicola Salmon

Fat and Fertility with Nicola Salmon

 

Nicola Salmon is a fat-positive fertility coach and acupuncturist that has helped women around the world to find their path to something they’ve wanted their entire lives…parenthood. Today she talks with us about her journey to this inspiring career, and what she feels is one of the most crucial steps in helping her clients achieve their dream.

 

This information-packed episode is one you won’t want to miss!

What we’re talking about

 

  • Growing Up With the Shame of Being Fat
  • Trauma and How It Led to Becoming A Fat-Positive Fertility Coach
  • Embracing Her Own Fat Identity and Helping Other Bigger Bodied Women Get Pregnant

 

Growing Up With the Shame of Being Fat

 

Nicola lays it all out there with how it felt to grow up bigger, and feeling “different” than her peers. As young as age 8-9, she realized that she wasn’t the same as her friends. She was “bigger.” She was pressured to do things to get “healthy” (aka: lose weight), but Nicola accepted her size, and came to her “fat identity” at this age even with external pressure to see the number on the scale get smaller. At age 16 she was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome), and told she would never be able to have children.

 

Trauma and How It Led to Becoming A Fat-Positive Fertility Coach

 

When Nicola was just out of university, she was living in London. She was soundly asleep when a man was shot on her doorstep, and bullets flew just inches above her window. This led to PTSD, and, in her search for healing, she discovered acupuncture. The acupuncture was a game changer, helping to relieve her PTSD, and spurring her interest to help others with this tool. Her natural interest in PCOS and hormones led her to become a trained fertility coach.

 

Embracing Her Own Fat Identity and Helping Other Bigger Bodied Women Get Pregnant

 

Even though Nicola did not struggle with becoming pregnant, it was after delivering her own child that she not only embraced her fat identity, but she wanted to help other bigger bodied women to achieve their dream of parenthood as well. She focuses on finding supportive healthcare professionals, mental and physical aspects of how being fat affects the goal of becoming pregnant, and creating a positive mindset to set your body up for success.

 

LINKS MENTIONED

Nicola Salmon on Instagram

Nicola Salmon on Facebook

Nicola Salmon’s Website

Fat and Fertile by Nicola Salmon

Fat Girl Finds Love Facebook Group

 

 TIMESTAMPS

  • 20:23 – 21:15 (52 sec NS) For a lot of people, when they’re going through fertility…not getting enough intake for your body.
  • 25:24 – 25:57 (33 sec NS) One of the things I recommend…we should be looking at and focusing on.
  • 28:26 – 29:11 (44 sec NS) I would suggest that they spend some time…they don’t want to miss that opportunity to make a baby.
  • 31:46 – 32:20 (34 sec NS) Really figuring out what we believe…it just helps things fit together better.

QUOTES

 

  1. Weight is meant to fluctuate. It’s meant to fluctuate throughout the day, throughout our menstrual cycle, throughout our lifetime. – NS
  2. Making sure we’re getting all our needs met, and making sure that we’re taking care of those needs both sexual and non-sexual intimacy needs is really important. NS
  3. In order to advocate for yourself, you have to, at some level, believe you’re worth advocating for. BC

A mindset is a really critical component of being able to have a joyful, pleasurable life. If you’re worried all the time, you’re not going to see the joy coming at you. You’re not going to be able to be in the moment & be joyful. BC 

If you enjoyed this episode and want more, join our FB group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/fatgirlfindslove/

You can also find Fat Girl Finds Love:

FP Page: https://www.facebook.com/FatGirlFindsLovePod/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fatgirlfindslove/

Twitter: @exxxxtrafat

And join us in the community! Fat Girls Finds Love FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fatgirlfindslove/

Transcript coming soon!

Most people learn about new podcasts throughfriends. So please share the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast with your fellow podcasters on twitter. If this episode got you all fired up SUBSCRIBE wherever you get your podcasts! ONE CLICK!

Community!

You can ask your questions continue the conversation and meet your fellow Fat Girl Finds Love Community members, by simply joining the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast Facebook Group!

EP 13 – Fat and Fertility with Nicola Salmon

EP 12 – Desire with Dalia Kinsey

Ep. 12: Desire with Dalia

Desire with Dalia 

“It’s funny how that works, when you have a desire. It just comes back stronger and stronger and stronger.” Dalia Kinsey

We’re in a bit of transition with our show notes. We just hired someone to help. So there are tons of details coming.

 

For now you can reach Dalia:

www.schoolnutritiondietitian.com

School Nutrition Podcast (iTunes)

School Nutrition Podcast (Spotify)

Follow Dalia on Facebook  Instagram LinkedIn

 

If you enjoyed this episode and want more, join our FB group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/fatgirlfindslove/

You can also find Fat Girl Finds Love:

FP Page: https://www.facebook.com/FatGirlFindsLovePod/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/fatgirlfindslove/

Twitter: @exxxxtrafat

And join us in the community! Fat Girls Finds Love FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fatgirlfindslove/

Transcript coming soon!

Most people learn about new podcasts throughfriends. So please share the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast with your fellow podcasters on twitter. If this episode got you all fired up SUBSCRIBE wherever you get your podcasts! ONE CLICK!

Community!

You can ask your questions continue the conversation and meet your fellow Fat Girl Finds Love Community members, by simply joining the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast Facebook Group!

EP 11 – Polyamory and Bisexuality with Gloria Jackson Nefertiti

EP 11 – Polyamory and Bisexuality with Gloria Jackson Nefertiti

Ep. 11: Polyamory and Bisexuality with Gloria JN!

Gloria Jackson Nefertiti and Briana talk Bisexuality, Polyamory and Wombats!

In this episode I hung out with one of my favorite folks: Gloria Jackson Nefertiti! We’ve been online friends for 20+ years and only this year met in person! Wild, huh?

 

So we talk about:

 

Polyamory and having non-hierarchical relationships

Bisexuality and both being bisexual

Racism in poly community

Being valued and loved

Oh and WoMBaTs! Come find out what a WoMBaT is!

 

Bio

Gloria Jackson-Nefertiti is a polyamory educator, bisexual activist, and sex geek who is available for panel discussions and presentations on responsible non-monogamy, bisexuality, transcending shame, and abuse in the poly and sex-positive communities. She has done presentations and panel discussions at various schools, colleges, and conferences all over the United States and Canada, including Loving More/Poly Living (Denver, CO and Philadelphia, PA), SF BiCon (San Francisco and Oakland, CA), West Coast Bound Kink Conference (Coquitlam, BC), and ConvergeCon (Vancouver, BC). She has been fascinated by relationships and sexuality as long as she can remember, even during her fundamentalist xtian days. She is also a breast cancer survivor, published poet, public speaker, singer, photographer, performance artist and long-time artists’ model. You can learn more about Gloria from the following articles: #WomanCentered: GLORIA JACKSON-NEFERTITI – part of a series of interviews seeking to tell the inspiring, interconnected stories of women’s reproductive health, rights, and empowerment (PART ONE https://tinyurl.com/yat9pgpb and PART TWO https://tinyurl.com/y7ur8puu), and “Life with Two Boyfriends: Inside a Polyamorous Relationshiphttps://tinyurl.com/y73fgsow

 

You can find Gloria on 

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/GloriaJacksonNefertiti 

Twitter https://twitter.com/gloriajn 

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/gloriajacksonnefertiti/ 

Her website, Not Gloria Jean http://notgloriajean.net/ 

Gloria lives in Seattle, WA.

And join us in the community! Fat Girls Finds Love FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fatgirlfindslove/

Transcript coming soon!

Most people learn about new podcasts throughfriends. So please share the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast with your fellow podcasters on twitter. If this episode got you all fired up SUBSCRIBE wherever you get your podcasts! ONE CLICK!

Community!

You can ask your questions continue the conversation and meet your fellow Fat Girl Finds Love Community members, by simply joining the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast Facebook Group!

EP 10 – Trolls and Georgia is Re-opening? with Dalia Kinsey

EP 10 – Trolls and Georgia is Re-opening? with Dalia Kinsey

Ep. 10: Fatphobia, Trolls and … GeorgIA? with Dalia Kinsey!

Dalia Kiney and Briana talk Fatphobia, Trolls and Georgia

Dalia Kinsey joins us again this week!

This week really focus on:

Our week. How things are going podcasting in the times of pandemic

how Covid is affecting Dalia and I.

And then we talk about trolls. We are looking for a guest to come on and talk about trolls! Is that you? Reach out to us! Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/FatGirlFindsLovePod

 

And join us in the community! Fat Girls Finds Love FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fatgirlfindslove/

Dalia Kinsey joins us again this week!

This week really focus on:

Our week. How things are going podcasting in the times of pandemic

how Covid is affecting Dalia and I.

And then we talk about trolls. We are looking for a guest to come on and talk about trolls! Is that you? Reach out to us! Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/FatGirlFindsLovePod

 

And join us in the community! Fat Girls Finds Love FB group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/fatgirlfindslove/

Transcript coming soon!

Most people learn about new podcasts throughfriends. So please share the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast with your fellow podcasters on twitter. If this episode got you all fired up SUBSCRIBE wherever you get your podcasts! ONE CLICK!

Community!

You can ask your questions continue the conversation and meet your fellow Fat Girl Finds Love Community members, by simply joining the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast Facebook Group!

EP 08 – Fat Body  Pilates with Lindsey Strobel

EP 08 – Fat Body Pilates with Lindsey Strobel

Ep. 7: Fat Body Pilates with Lindsey Strobel!

Lindsey Strobel,

…the brains and bod behind Fat Body Pilates, was introduced to the concept of fat acceptance on Livejournal in the late 90s. Discovering a movement that didn’t view her body as something to apologize for was incredibly affirming, and she has remained connected to the cause across a variety of social media platforms and in her local Minneapolis/St. Paul community.

 

Lindsey began practicing Pilates in 2016 at the suggestion of a physical therapist and quickly recognized the benefits of the method, despite a culture that struck her as exclusive of individuals in larger bodies. In 2017 she began her Pilates teacher training through Balanced Body. Her Fat Body Pilates Instagram account was created in 2019 in response to the lack of body diversity in Pilates imagery. 

 

Show notes: Fat Body Pilates with Lindsey Strobel!

 

In her free time, when she’s not on her reformer forgetting to count her repetitions, Lindsey can be found curled up with her cats, a cup of tea, and a good book, gardening, or traveling with her partner. Follow her on Instagram: @fatbodypilates

In this episode we talk about:
– How she found her fat identity 

– Fatshionistas on Livejournal

– How she got started in pilates

– She and her husband doing pilates

– How pilates is set up for thin people

– How lineage contributes to thin gaze and the idea that this is only for thin people

– Lindsey being an example of a fat person who is doing the work

– Financial privilege in being able to go to classes regularly and working to change access for more bodies in pilates

– Using her body to show people that more is possible with pilates, and fatness!

Transcript coming soon!

Most people learn about new podcasts throughfriends. So please share the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast with your fellow podcasters on twitter. If this episode got you all fired up SUBSCRIBE wherever you get your podcasts! ONE CLICK!

Community!

You can ask your questions continue the conversation and meet your fellow Fat Girl Finds Love Community members, by simply joining the Fat Girl Finds Love Podcast Facebook Group!